Shakilla

2009-12-04T09:47:00.001-08:00

if you meet me halfway,right at the boaderline
thats where i will wait,for you.

HAPPY ONE MORE MONTH TO 3 YEARS HONEY!

and now,to learn to move on without having ica in my life anymore.

2009-11-06T08:07:00.000-08:00

i am only left with that 3 months things.Haa

things to do for holidays,nothing.
i off to bed.i wish theres gigi to take my nightmares away.
i hate doing last office.

2009-10-12T06:04:00.000-07:00

Have i ever think why i have to go through a life that wasnt meant for me at all?

I never enjoy doing this,i never thought it would be this tough fo rme to handle.I hate the every single facts that this makes me go puke.But i have to survived.I couldn't control myself when i see her cry like that.Is it my fault that i couldnt be a better guardian?He kept on emphasising the fact that she's not mine,i dont have to get all stressed up.But i've been spending alot of time with her,so it does make me responsible somehow.Knowing that the caretaker is having cancer and may have a relapse,and knowing the fact that you guys are not doing anything make me sick.You should be having a stable job or something cause it is your responsibility to take care of her and the caretaker.The other you,go find some courage and own up your mistake,god knows they could help you.Why dont you think about her at all?She's developing,im sure she knows that there isn't someone permanent in her life.She sees this person that person.Don't you feel sad knowing that she is lonely?Are you human without any emotions?Until when you want her to be this way?If the caretaker is no longer in help,im sure all you fucking think is where to put her but not to solve the matter.Cause it seems to me,all it matters to you is your own fucking life.I swear to god,if this still happens when i start working,i will take her.Away from you,possibly.

2009-10-04T09:51:00.000-07:00

Admit it you don't seem to care.

Happy fucking anniversary;if you even fucking remembered.

2009-09-27T09:55:00.000-07:00

Why do i keep updating myself about other people's life?
It seems that they tend to have a joyous adventure of life compared to mine.Haha.Seriously,it's a lil bit psychotic to think about waht i do everyday.Go online,and read other's ranting about their own life and not forgetting feed pet pet,go fishing.I wonder whether anyone keeps track of my life.Even my own boyfriend doesn't give a heck about it.Should i be calling him a soulmate or just a friend now?Whatever la.Anyway.Back to my own stupid confession.Sometimes,while i was bloghopping,i tend to have questions that needed to be answered,do they really have that kind of life or its just all pretend?cause it seems to be too perfect sometimes.Or maybe they are just exagaratin much?God knows what million questionnaires i have set in my mind.I should prolly have my own television shows on reality blog to answer all those thoughts of mine.
So yes,RAYA is here.Hah.I still haven't finish visiting people.Can u imagine that?everyday,every single day,i,siti norshakilla bte yusof,never fail to go out rayaing.Like i said,its the last year i will receive money so why not just celebrate it when i can.Haha.and oh,out of all this sibuqueen rayaing,i came across someone after sucha a long time.My childhood friend,shakilah.Its quite funny to think back what we did last time,played pretend and all.I feel kinda of awkward seeing her again cause we are so much different now but whatever it is,it was nice to see her again.And be strong my dear friend,he's a total jerk.

2009-09-14T04:56:00.000-07:00

elephant onmyhead elephant onmyhead elephant onmyhead

2009-09-06T11:15:00.000-07:00

Im extremely gooey and slimy
I love living in a dark narrow alley
Sometimes my family needs to occupy two alleys
But somehow it depends who turns up
To add more love to my place, i would want it to have the sensitive touch
That would be perfect
But when the wind comes, my family tends to get separated
Either in white or a blue land
Either way i will still come back
Cause i would not want to miss my dark alley
I am not other than mucus of Siti Norshakilla Binte Yusof
I will forever be hers
Cause she will always produce me
When she is caught red handed with either some dust friends of hers
Or it could simply be her besfriend,the always-changing-weather
I love this place,especially when Mr and Mrs Yellow phlegm comes along.

But i will be gone soon i guess,cause it seems like she is separating more more of my family members.Soon it will be turn.Maybe in next two days or so,i will be gone.But dont worry,i will come back,cause ur favourite dust friends will eventually be beside you.

2009-09-02T09:15:00.000-07:00

Grant this one last wish.I want us to be over.

2009-08-29T07:24:00.000-07:00

I dont get it.I feel so used.I dont want to go back to you.

Ica is strumming a guitar with no string now,and she is singging in her own words.Haah

2009-08-21T05:36:00.000-07:00

As days goes by, i look superbly tired right.Hah.Anyhoo.Somtimes i wish you are long gone,you're just someone who is i dont want to know.Im tired of always having to listen and be blame for things that you're doing the same.I dont get it,why must we be in this position forever?I hate this alot.

2009-08-20T00:30:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ,YOU'RE BORN IN THE ZOO,YOU'RE FACE LIKE "CAT CAT",HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

2009-08-13T07:25:00.000-07:00

updated

On 12 august,i turned 19! hehe.So i ended class at 11.They brought me to changi airport and ate popeye.Right after we ate,wardah realises that her phone was lost.We eventuallly went round and round to search for it.It was return by a cleaner.Then i met khai.So the end.

So on 8 of august.My uncle got married and we reached home at almost midnight.So when dad went to toilet to refresh himself,we were at the hall,blowing up balloons,decorate here and there and put the cake and presents.Overall, it was okay and we celebrated right on the dot,9 of august.He was shock cause we did it in a short while.And he didnt even notice that we had bought a cake.To summarise things up, he loved it so much that he changed his wallet immediately..hahah

2009-08-09T07:55:00.000-07:00

i want to wake up in a room filled sunflowers
i want to wake up to see you next to me
i want to hear your voice every single second
i want to live in a world where problems are solved easily
i want to celebrate my birthday with you
i want to meet you every single fucking day
i want to kill everyone who had made my heart aches
i want to stop crying cause of stupid thing
i want to be less sensitive
i want you to be more understanding
i want you to open up your feelings to me
i want you to share your fucking problem with me
i want to feel like a girlfriend, not a fucked up dumb shit
i want everything
i want this
i want that

........................................................i just hate being i
i want to wish dad and sharel's brother happy birthday

2009-08-01T08:40:00.000-07:00

I watched hangover today. It was superbly hilarious. Its really a movie to catch. So the date acutally almost went well today except the fact he confessed about something. It made me think hard, too hard that its going to be hard for me to believe him in the future. I hate it when this happens. And to make things even weirder for today, i bumped into my older brother.

And to think back, i should really be doing my project now.This life sucks hardcore.

Lily allen - fuck you
Look inside, look inside your tiny mind
Then look a bit harder'
Cause we're so uninspired, so sick and tired
Of all the hatred you harbor
So you say it's not okay to be gay
Well, I think you're just evil
You're just some racist who can't tie my laces
Your point of view is medieval

Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

Do you get, do you get a little kick
Out of being small minded?
You want to be like your father
It's approval you're after
Well, that's not how you find it
Do you, do you really enjoy
Living a life that's so hateful?'
Cause there's a hole where your soul should be
You're losing control a bit
And it's really distasteful

Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you

You say you think we need to go to war
Well, you're already in one'
Cause it's people like you that need to get slew
No one wants your opinion

Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause we hate what you do
And we hate your whole crew
So please don't stay in touch

Fuck you, fuck you very, very much'
Cause your words don't translate
And it's getting quite late
So please don't stay in touch
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck
you, fuck you, fuck you

2009-07-30T06:29:00.000-07:00

You're becoming more and more sickening.
11pm......im waiting for you my hot stuff sheemar moore

2009-07-25T09:16:00.000-07:00

I am going wheeeziiiinnnggggggggggg everywhere.Great.How to tell gigi i cannot meet?

2009-07-17T17:58:00.000-07:00

This is ica's face when she doesnt get her what she want.To add on, she will throw herself anywhere she can..TANTRUMS.So noty okay.But she is forever lovable.She's right beside me sleeping now.Of course its just 9 in the morning.And she had just taken her sleeping medication=her milk at 7 just now.Anyhoo, my mum had given birth safely, adn she had her fallopian tube cut as well.She lost too much blood so she had to be in the observation ward longer and she was recieving blood.She had stitches at her tummy and iv cannulation on both hands cause the left one doesn't seem to work.So, now she's fine.Will be going there at 3.And now to come to the interesting part....my baby sister.hehehe.She has my sister's eyes,my face,my hair,my small ears,my sibling's fingers(long long ones),and not to forget my birth mark on the butt!haha.And she's fair..Only for now.When she grows up, she will be like me and my brother.Cause its the same cycle that i went thru and also my brother. And i had put ica's video in cause she is totally cute..She had chose to ride the motor instead of her new laptop for her bday.hehehehehe.Im sucha happy bitch. My dad took all this pictures without the knowledge of the nurse.

Are you my dad?

Ica when she is still small.Hehehe.

2009-07-15T06:40:00.000-07:00

Im feeling the stress now.Everything just come and it seems like never ending.And the worst part they will never go away.To add on more salt to the wound, im always in bad mood with boyfriend.And it seems he doesnt know me well.Fuck.And please dont let friday come so soon..im happy if there are two,but i dont think i cant handle it when there is none.

2009-07-14T06:16:00.000-07:00

At last my family celebrated icang bday.Hahaha.I missed so much.Now, that she's here, i will be having sleepless nights and having projects to accompany me when she sleeps cries at the same time.Nevertheless, i love her to bits.

I wont be meeting gigi anytime soon i guess.Isn't that sad?But i should be happy that he is starting work soon..right?

2009-07-11T09:15:00.000-07:00

Oh my god.Pet society and restaurant city are really getting to my nerves.Soon all the heat in body will just explode all the organs within me.Its been two whole fucking days i cannot go in.Irritating much?

Gigi went job hunting.So he's knocked out.No one accompanying me tonight.Oh what the hell,even if he's awake, he won't call.Guys.Kadang kadang aku menyampah dgn orang orang gitu.Lepas tu bile complain,banyak lakk die nak membebel.Sume die betul.Kalau tak complain,nanti orang orang gitu mengamok pulak bile kite tak ckp pape.Siaper yng tak darah up kann.Melayu shakilla power skali.Hahaha.

Home had been hmmmm.3 people dream of bad things at 3 am yesterday.Firstly,person number one dreamt of being bitten by a dog,which means that someone else is trying to do something bad on that person or something bad will happen.Second person dreamt of ghost.Woke up crying.This actually meant that the thing is inside or trying to get inside.And lastly,the third person dreamt of having 4 broken teeth.as in dropped out.Haiya u know what i mean la.This usually signalled that someone is going to die.Someone close or maybe just someone the third person would know.Now,i dont know whether to believe it or its just the 'dream scare' just to play around with our minds.Whatever it is,extra precautions are a must to be done cause one more newborn will arrived soon.

I was youtube-ing when i heard this song.haha

Rossa - Hey ladies.(Somehow the lyrics caught me.)

Sudah kubilang jangan terlalu yakin

Mulut lelaki banyak juga tak jujur

Bila sakit hati wanita bisanya nangis

Sudah ku bilang jangan terlalu cinta

Kalau patah hati siapa mau nolong

Seperti langit dan matahari tak bersatu lagi

Hey ladies jangan mau di bilang lemah

Kita juga bisa menipu dan menduakan

Bila wanita sudah beraksi dunia hancur

Hey ladies sekarang cinta pakai otak

Jangan mau rugi hati dan juga rugi waktu

Bila dia merayumu ingat semuanya bohong

Memanglah tak semua laki-laki busuk

Namun ladies tetaplah harus waspada

Semogalah kita semua akhirnya

Mendapatkan cinta yang tulus

Sudah kubilang jangan terlalu yakin

Mulut lelaki banyak juga tak jujur

Bila sakit hati wanita bisanya nangis

2009-07-06T05:05:00.000-07:00

Love is like shit,i'm never gonna understand the true meaning and how special it is.

2009-06-24T03:00:00.000-07:00

Im tired of always being the one to run after you.Enough is enough

2009-06-20T03:59:00.001-07:00

2 weeks past.and you're still not here.i cant stop shedding my tears cause it hurts too much.

2009-06-14T08:36:00.000-07:00

So eveything didnt turn out well just now.Went to our destination but it was to crowded and the movie was closed.Fuck right.So we went to some park in woodlands, and to his favourite place.So yes.bye.i very tired.hahh

2009-06-13T20:07:00.000-07:00

It's time to celebrate my love's bday.I am so nervous.I just hope everything goes according to plan.I cooked spagetti with the help of mama and mama gave me soem money so that i could buy him the cake.I know budget.But it is soooo adorable.If he doesnt like it, i will bring it back home then.Lets just hope my wishes of not having to endure a painful weather will be granted.Wish me luck people.haha.

Tee bday bash photo!

the bday girl camera girl

the penyanyi of the year.dont play play tau. And oh boy,i do miss ica alot.

2009-06-12T07:04:00.000-07:00

I can never have the time to enjoy by myself. You always have to tag along, you always have to throw tantrums at me when you dont get things, you always hurt my feelings, you never have listen to what i will say, you are so rude to me and only me, and you never say sorry to me before. How am i suppose to act like im a good person when you're doing this. And you always have them to side you. Fuck larh kay. I need time for myself. I dont want to give a fuck what you say or do anymore. Cause i always tried but you always take it for granted.

2009-06-11T06:24:00.000-07:00

Irritating.Flu.Do i need to say more?

2009-06-10T08:39:00.001-07:00

Oh before i forgot,lets summarise how my monday was.I enjoyed myself.Really.We had planned to go to a family karaoke place where it was cheapest amongst all karaoke place we knew.But it was fully booked.Blame it on the fact that it was school holidays.So we dragged our feets to the nearest place we could find, with the blindfolded birthday girl.And it happened to be K-box.So blah blah blah.And blah blah blah,to end this off,i actually went home with bloated feet and off i went to bed.I will upload the photos soon.If i want to.Haha.
I think FYP is getting to me.Getting to all the final year students.Its really dreadful.To add things more 'simple-rrrr',im going to be heartbroken in the next few months.How devastated my life is getting on.
Sometimes,i stop and think to myself,what is the exact reason that all of us have to kill our brain when we can actually try to live in harmony and understand each other?Why cant we just have a life where life is just beautifully blissed with peace?Haiya.bye larh.

below post was updated in the afternoon.

I cannot wait for rainbow's bday.23rd 23rd 23rd.Though i am so so short in cash, i paid closed attention to those detail on what i could spent or what i could bring from home.I hope he likes it.WISH ME LUCK FOR THIS SUNDAY.:))

2009-06-07T00:24:00.001-07:00

Learning to let go is always the hardest step in life. But we have to, even if we dont want it.